Traveling in Place

Discerning the Covenant of Marriage

Late last Friday night, the State Senate here in New York passed a bill legalizing same-sex marriage.  The governor signed it into law an hour later.  This surprise development has raised lots of questions for local town clerks, who expect to be flooded with requests for marriage licenses when the law goes into effect July 24.  But it is not the case that churches across New York are suddenly scrambling to review or rewrite their wedding policies.  For the state, marriage is a civil union, and the vote on Friday night concerned civil rights.  For churches, marriage is a sacred covenant – not a right but a privilege, and therefore our approach to marriage is necessarily different from the approach of the state.

Churches here and across the country fall into three categories when it comes to the issue of gay marriage.  First, there are churches that define marriage exclusively as a union between one man and one woman.  Second, there are churches that have been advocating same-sex marriage for years, if not decades.  Neither of these categories of churches will be affected by the change in state law.  Their own marriage policies are settled and not up for negotiation.  A third category of churches have welcomed gays and lesbians and have been trying to discern how best to approach the subject of gay marriage.  This last category is probably the most reflective of the general public.

With Congratulations

It’s high school graduation day in our community.  During my tenure as president of the local school board, no higher privilege was afforded me than the opportunity to present diplomas to graduating seniors during the annual commencement ceremony.  Each year, before the students crossed the stage, I addressed them and their families.  What follows is the text of the speech I gave at the 2007 commencement ceremony.

Before you walk across this stage, there’s one more thing you need to hear.  Maybe some of you have already heard this, but I want to make sure everybody hears it.

I guess I’m pretty “old school” when it comes to education (pun intended).  I believe that the original purpose of public education in this country is still its most important.  Benjamin Franklin was the first great American statesman.  At the close of the Constitutional Convention in 1787, as Franklin was emerging from Independence Hall in Philadelphia, a woman stopped him and asked, “Dr. Franklin, what kind of government have you given us?”  He replied, “A republic, Madame, if you can keep it.”

Graduation Reflections

Graduation weekend is upon us.  This past Sunday, our church honored the high school graduates who are members of our congregation.  The longer I am pastor of the same congregation, the more bittersweet that moment is for me.  I give congratulatory handshakes to young people whom I once saw toddling down to the nursery, looking at me expectantly during a children’s message, racing nervously through a scripture reading during a youth-led service, and stepping forward to profess Jesus as Lord during their confirmation service.  (It won’t be much longer before I’m saying goodbye to college- and military-bound young people whom I baptized as infants!) 

This year, one of our graduates is my youngest son.  Twice before, I’ve congratulated one of my own children for reaching this milestone and then moved them into college the next fall.  It was tough both times.  (The conventional wisdom that “it gets easier after the first one” just makes no sense to me because I have enjoyed unique relationships with each of my children.)  This will be the last time, which means that my wife and I will join the ranks of “empty nesters.”  After this summer, for the first time in 23 years, I will be preaching weekly to a congregation that includes none of my children.  I wonder how – or whether – that will change my self-understanding as a pastor.  It will certainly increase my empathy for the many folks in my church whose children have grown and moved away.  On Father’s Day, I read in the newspaper that there are about 70 million dads in the U.S., and 27 million of them still have school-age children.  That means nearly two out of three dads live in empty nests (or at least have adult children; I know more young adults are living with their parents these days).  The statistic must be similar for moms.  Parents of adult children are the norm – no less in churches than anywhere else in society.

Of course, Martha and I still see our sons for holidays and other special occasions, and one or two of them will still be home for all or part of the next few summers.  The sweet nature of those reunions is one of the gifts of this transitional part of life.  And other gifts will no doubt become apparent as well.  But now is a time for reflection.  I feel a mixture of pride and grief, joy and sadness. 

Paul tells us to “rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep” (Romans 12:15).  There are times when we are doing both at once.

Copyright 2011 by J. Mark Lawson

An Important Statement for Immigration Reform

Delegates to the Southern Baptist Convention Annual Meeting in Phoenix, Arizona, this week passed a resolution calling for immigration reform, including a “path to legal status/citizenship.”  The entire resolution, found here, chastises the federal government for failing to control its borders and current immigration laws, and also failing to prosecute employers who hire illegal immigrants.  It notes that illegal immigrants have been “exploited” by our society, and that a clear biblical mandate exists to care for “the foreigners among us,” to “be a neighbor to those in need…regardless of their racial or ethnic background, country of origin, or legal status.”

The significance of passing this resolution while meeting in the state of Arizona, home to a harsh (and constitutionally questionable) immigration law, has not been lost on the media.  I believe it is also a significant moment for the relationship between American religion and politics.

The Meaning of Membership

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about church membership, which is not exactly in vogue these days.  The fastest growing religious segment in America is “unaffiliated.”  Sometimes, these Americans are called “SBNR’s” (Spiritual but Not Religious).  The cover story in a recent edition of Christian Century explored the growing phenomenon of “attending without joining,” and featured a St. Paul, Minnesota, church who has jettisoned membership entirely in favor of “dis-membership,” a tongue-in-cheek way for anti-institutional people to identify with the faith community.  Personally, I have been increasingly concerned about how few church visitors have shown any interest in discussing membership.  They would rather remain loosely connected, attending and giving when they have the time and extra money instead of signing on to any particular commitment.

The whole subject of “membership” has been fraught with controversy for quite some time.  Local congregations diverge widely in how they measure membership.  Not only do the formulas for calculating membership differ, but requirements for membership vary as well.  In some churches, the bar of membership is intentionally set low, so as to make the church welcoming.  In other congregations, membership requires high-level commitments of finances and time, so that more people attend services than are members.  Despite these variables, the ratio of membership to average worship attendance across all churches in America has remained relatively stable for decades.  On the whole, worship attendance is around 40% of total membership.

A Marvel of Resilience

Commenting on my last post, Larry referenced “the trees growing over the rocks in the Adirondacks” whose “strong, deep and long roots are formed through tenacity during many years despite adversity.”  I’m pretty sure he had in mind the marvel of nature pictured here – a sight that has captivated many a hiker near the beginning of the Great Range Trail, not far from the spur trail to Rooster Comb Mountain.

You look at these trees stretching big, strong, old roots around a massive rock and wonder, “How is that possible?”  Perhaps there is a pocket of soil out of sight from hikers (the rock is probably eight feet high), but even if that is the case, these trees are remarkable examples of resiliency in nature, and serve as metaphors of strength through adversity.

It is one thing to give thanks to God for leading us in green pastures and beside still waters.  It is another to recognize God’s leading through deep, dark valleys.  It’s one thing to put down roots in rich fertile soil.  It’s another to exercise the tenacity to overcome the thistles, pebbles, and even huge boulders that frustrate our growth.  God is the source of the good soil as well as strength of nature to grow around rocks to find the soil underneath.

Still Traveling in Place

Today, this blog is one year old.  My thanks to all who have taken the time to read, and especially to those who have posted comments.

Since most of my current readers have never seen my first post, I thought I should re-post it today.  It explains the reason for the blog’s title and a theme that crops up in a number of posts.  The only change I made to this entry is to update the reference to how many years I’ve been in ordained ministry.  I’m still traveling in place, discerning the joys and challenges of remaining with the same faith community for 16 ½ years.  

Here's what I posted one year ago:

Happy are those who do not follow the advice of the wicked/Or take the path that sinners tread, or sit in the seat of scoffers;/but their delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law they meditate day and night./They are like trees planted by streams of water,/Which yield their fruit in its season, and their leaves do not wither./In all that they do, they prosper.

The wicked are not so, but are like chaff that the wind drives away./Therefore the wicked will not stand in judgment,/Nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous;/For the Lord watches over the way of the righteous,/but the way of the wicked will perish. - Psalm 1, NRSV

I’ve been a local church pastor for 23 years with three different churches.  About two-thirds of that time has been spent with the same congregation.  The more deeply my roots reach into the same soil, the more reflective I am about the meaning of faith, the practice of community, and the gifts (and challenges) of longevity.